Citas Citables ( Desperate Housewives)*

[at dinner party with all the wives and their partners]
Bree: Rex cries after he ejaculates.

Lynette: Now listen to me, you are going to behave. I will not be humiliated in front of the entire neighborhood. And just so you know that I'm serious, I am...
[takes a piece of paper out of her pocket]
Porter Scavo: What's that?
Lynette: Santa's cell phone number!
Preston Scavo: How'd you get that?
Lynette: I know someone, who knows someone, who knows an elf. And if any of you acts up, so help me I will call Santa and tell him you want socks for Christmas! All right, are you willing to risk that?"

Karen McCluskey: How old are your boys anyway?
[Preston and Porter look at each other]
Porter Scavo: We're six.
Karen McCluskey: [turns to Parker]
Karen McCluskey: And you?
Parker Scavo: Five.
Karen McCluskey: Wow. Your mom just pops them out, doesn't she?
Preston Scavo: How old are you?
Karen McCluskey: How old do you think?
Porter Scavo: 150.

Julia: When was the last time you had sex?
[Susan stops what she is doing]
Julia: Are you mad that I asked?
Susan: No, I'm just trying to remember.

Bree: [to Rex, in the hospital, after a heart attack] I know you still love me. Maisy told me. As of this moment, Rex, I am no longer your wife. I am going to find the most vindictive lawyer I can find. And together, we will eviscerate you. I will take away your money, your family, and your dignity. And I am thrilled you still love me. Because I want what's going to happen to you to hurt as much as humanly possible. I'm just so glad you didn't die before I told you that.

[as he dresses for court in prison]
Carlos: Beating up a second gay guy looks bad.
Gabrielle: Yes, well, Carlos, in some circles, beating people up at all is frowned upon.

[Bree has agreed to try "dominating" Rex]
Rex: If things do get too rough, we'll have a control word. If one of us says it, the other backs off immediately.
Bree: Okay. So what's our control word?
Rex: Well, lately I've been using "Philadelphia". What's wrong?
Bree: Well, it's just that my Aunt Fern lives in Philadelphia, and I don't want to be thinking about her while I'm spanking you with a leather strap.
Rex: Okay. Fine. You pick a control word.
Bree: Um, how about "Boise"?
Rex: "Boise"?
Bree: What's the matter with "Boise"?
Rex: We're going to be doing psychological role playing here, Bree, and a funny word like "Boise" would ruin the mood. We need something that sounds serious.
Bree: Hmm.
[sombre tone]
Bree: How about "Palestine"?
Rex: "Boise" will be just fine.

Edie: [to Bree] You could have an affair with anyone and you choose the pharmacist? You are such a Republican.

[Alisa Stevens is a deaf woman]
Alisa Stevens: Dennis left me.
Lynette: What?

* Sacadas de http://wwww.imdb.com